


It Was Only A Kiss

by Soph_Writes_118



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Dare, Firehouse 118 as Family (9-1-1 TV), Friends to Lovers, Idiots in Love, M/M, Mutual Pining, Sports
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:20:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27459370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Soph_Writes_118/pseuds/Soph_Writes_118
Summary: When the 118 take a call to injuries at a basketball game, it seems like just another average day. But when Buck and Eddie get caught on the Kiss Cam, and their kiss subsequently goes viral, how do they handle the fallout?
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan “Buck” Buckley & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 28
Kudos: 456





	It Was Only A Kiss

**Author's Note:**

> So I was meant to be writing something else altogether, and then I read a line about a kiss cam in a book and it sparked this idea. Initially it was meant to be short and fluffy, but then I started reading about the controversial element around kiss cams and consent, and thought I could use it to work in a bit of Buddie angst as well!
> 
> I swear the word count was meant to be shorter than this, but Buck and Eddie got out of hand...

“Well this is the first time I’ve been called to an injury at a basketball game,” Chim said, jumping down from the ambulance with a bag of medical supplies. “Ice hockey or baseball I’d get, but basketball? What happened, did a player trip over the ball?”

“They wouldn’t need us if they did. Unless they’ve managed to take out half the court at once, the Clippers medics should be all over that,” Hen said, squinting in the November sunlight reflecting off the Staples Center in Downtown LA.

“It’s not the players,” Bobby called, climbing down from the fire truck. “It’s the spectators. Caller’s eight year-old daughter is trapped beneath one of the seats, and the caller got his arm trapped trying to get her out.” He looked round at Buck and Eddie. “Better bring all the gear with us just in case.”

“Does that mean we’re letting Buck loose with an axe?” Chim asked. “Because you know what happened the last time he got hold of an axe and there was a child involved...”

“No,” Eddie said with an amused expression, balancing a saw in one hand and an axe in the other. “What happened?”

“Nothing, the baby was fine,” Buck said quickly, grabbing the jaws of life.

“It might not have been if you’d been allowed to take the axe to the wall like you were planning to,” Chim reminded him.

“Hey, the baby was suffocating in a pipe _inside_ the wall!”

“Let’s not get into this now,” Hen said, hoisting her own medical bag onto her shoulder. “You can argue it out over dinner later.”

A steward picked them up as they entered the stadium, and directed them to Section 118, where a young girl was wedged under a seat. Her father, putting on a brave face for her, was trying not to panic about the fact that his arm was turning slowly purple, wedged tight between the seats where he’d tried to help his daughter get free. As Bobby, Buck and Eddie cleared the immediate rows around them of spectators so they could work, Hen and Chim moved in to assess their patients.

“What’s your name, sweetheart?” Hen asked, ducking down to the girl’s eye level.

“Riley.”

“Hey Riley, my name’s Hen. We’re going to get you out of there, don’t worry.”

“Please hurry, I’m scared!”

“Don’t worry Riley, we brought some hired muscle with us to get you out,” Chim said, indicating Buck and Eddie, both armed with axes, the hydraulic ram and the jaws of life.

“Delicate approach, boys,” Bobby emphasised from the end of the aisle. As space was tight, Hen and Chim worked from the row below Riley and her father to give medical aid, while Buck and Eddie worked from the row above to free them.

As the game had stopped play due to the disruption, they had quite an audience, with players and fans alike craning to watch. Eddie shot Bobby a look, and he spoke to a steward discreetly. Within moments, the commentator’s voice crackled into life overhead.

“Hey Clippers fans. We should be able to resume play shortly. Thank you for your patience. While the brave men and women of the LAFD do their thing, let’s run the Kiss Cam!”

The Jumbotron hanging above the court lit up with a spinning heart, before changing to footage of the stadium. As Faith Hill’s _This Kiss_ blared out, the camera zoomed in on the first couple, dressed in head-to-toe LA Clippers gear. They jumped in surprise to find themselves featured, laughed and leaned in to kiss. An elderly couple followed, then a pair of awkward teenagers on a first date.

“I’ve never been more glad to be here in uniform,” Hen murmured, as the camera panned around the stadium for more unsuspecting victims. “Could you imagine anything more awkward than being caught on that thing?”

“Keep your head down, just in case,” Chim muttered.

“How do you want to do this?” Buck asked Eddie, eyeing the various tools they’d brought with them.

“Axes won’t be precise enough and will take too long. Saws would be too dangerous with the sparks. I say we use the jaws.”

Buck and Eddie moved seamlessly, working together with a precision that almost seemed telepathic. As Hen and Chim watched from below, giving guidance on where to angle the jaws, Buck and Eddie worked from above to cut through the steel framework around the seats. The crowd cheered as the seats came apart and Riley’s father was able to stand, massaging a swollen, bruised arm, and Riley climbed to her feet, beaming with relief.

“Good call, GI!” Buck said, clapping a hand to Eddie’s shoulder. “Who said soldiers are all brawn and no brains?”

“Trying out the ‘GI’ nickname again, are we?” Eddie asked, rolling his eyes, but unable to keep a smile from his face.

“Hey, you were happy enough with Albert calling you a ‘noble warrior.’”

“Who doesn’t want to be a noble warrior? Beats brainless brawn, or whatever you might think being a soldier means.”

“Hey, I think you’re very noble,” Buck said, and flashed a grin at Eddie. “And you can count to ten and march in a straight line and everything. What more do you need in the military?”

Eddie elbowed him in the ribs, and Hen rolled her eyes.

“So I think you’re both going to be OK,” she said to Riley’s father, raising her voice to drown out Buck and Eddie, “but you might want to get your doctor to check your arm over once that swelling’s gone down to make sure there’s no lasting damage.”

“Thank you. I think we’ll head out now and grab some lunch.” He shot Hen a sheepish smile. “Not sure I want to spend the rest of the game being _that guy_ who got his arm trapped in a seat.”

Hen smiled in sympathy.

“Trust me, you won’t be the first or last.”

She nodded to Bobby, who gave the signal to a steward to start the game again.

“Great work guys,” he called down the row. “Let’s wrap it up.”

As Riley and her father gathered their things and the 118 packed up their gear, the commentator worked up to the big finale.

“And now, for our final couple on today’s Kiss Cam!”

The crowd noise surged, and suddenly a lot of faces seemed to be facing their way again.

“Umm, guys...” Chim said, nodding up. Buck and Eddie followed his gaze.

The Kiss Cam was focused directly on them, a giant heart carved around them on the screen.

“Go, go, go!” Chim muttered to Hen.

“Wait, you’re leaving us?” Buck hissed.

“That’s right. Sorry Buckaroo, you’re on your own!”

With Riley and her father ahead of them, Hen and Chim scooted out of the aisle to the stairs, where Bobby was waiting. Stranded in the wreckage of the seats, Buck and Eddie glanced at each other.

“ _Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!_ ” the crowd chanted.

“What do you want to do?” Eddie muttered.

Buck took a deep breath.

“I think we should give them a show,” he replied. And before fear or doubt could catch up with him he leaned in, cupped the side of Eddie’s face with his hand, and kissed him.

Eddie tensed and Buck felt his breath hitch under his lips, but the hesitation lasted only a split second before he responded, his mouth moving urgently against Buck’s. Eddie’s hand came up to graze the side of Buck’s jaw, and he coaxed his mouth open and slid his tongue against Buck’s. For a few short seconds, the world fell away to just the two of them, desperately trying to memorise the scent and feel and taste of each other. Then the roaring from the spectators filled their ears, and Buck and Eddie jolted apart, brought roughly back to earth.

“And that’s how it’s done, Clipper Nation!” the commentator yelled.

Hen and Chim were gawping at them, and Bobby’s eyebrows were doing a great impression of Athena’s, sky-high, arms folded. Buck let out a breath, trying to regain his composure. Eddie was staring at the ground like he wished it would swallow him up.

“Wow, I don’t think we’ve seen a kiss like that in a while!” the commentator boomed. “Give it up for the LAFD being such good sports and joining in with our game night tradition!”

“Time to go,” Bobby said, gesturing to his crew, and the 118 beat a hasty retreat. But the crowd weren’t about to let them go without a fight. Hands gripped at Buck and Eddie as they passed, and voices called out to them.

“Congratulations!”

“You guys make such a cute couple!”

“You’re an inspiration!”

“That was so hot!”

Somehow they fought their way back outside, where the afternoon air was blessedly cool on Buck’s burning face. He sucked in a breath, high on post-kiss adrenaline. If he’d have known kissing Eddie would feel like something clicking into place in his chest, like every nerve ending in his body was alight, then he would have done it years ago. Buzzing, Buck glanced sideways at Eddie with a bashful grin, expecting him to be embarrassed but laughing it off. Maybe Eddie was also feeling the same wild mix of emotions running through his system? It blew Buck away how naturally they fit together. Kissing Eddie was like coming up from beneath the waves and finally being able to gasp in a lungful of air. Surely Eddie felt that too?

But Buck wasn’t prepared for the tense expression tightening Eddie’s jaw and narrowing his eyes. An angry, shut off look Buck hadn’t seen in over a year.

“Eddie…?”

He reached for his shoulder uncertainly as they reached the side of the truck, but Eddie yanked his arm away before he could make contact.

“What the hell was that, Buck?” he snapped.

“What?”

“Why did you do that?”

Buck swallowed, exhilaration turning cold in his stomach.

“We were on the Kiss Cam,” he said slowly, wondering how he’d misjudged this so badly. “They weren’t going to leave us alone, I thought we might as well just go with it.”

“You had no right to do that,” Eddie said shortly. Buck fought down a twinge of panic and opted for the defensive, to play it off as a joke.

“Well you weren’t exactly stopping me. It was only a kiss, what’s the big deal?”

“ _What’s the big deal?”_ Eddie’s eyes flashed. “You jumped me in front of a stadium full of strangers, without my consent!”

Buck gawped at him.

“I jumped you? What are you saying, that I _forced myself_ on you?” Buck shook his head, stowing his axe in the side of the truck and slamming the door. “That’s _bullshit_ , Eddie, I would never do that.”

Anger mingled with panic in his chest, and the words fell fast and uncontrolled from his lips.

“It was only a kiss, a stupid dare from a camera. And tell me, Eddie at what point did you not consent to me kissing you? Was it when you kissed me back, or when you stuck your tongue in my mouth?”

Buck turned his back on Eddie and jumped up into the fire truck, wishing they were somewhere out of public view where he could slam a door and storm off. Back on the ground, Eddie sighed and rubbed his hand across the back of his neck, staring at the ground.

“You alright, Eddie?” Bobby asked, with all the certainty of a man who knew just how out of his depth he was with this question.

“Yeah, fine Cap. Sorry about that, back there. It was unprofessional. It won’t happen again.”

And Eddie climbed onto the truck after Buck, making sure to sit as far apart as they could get within the same cab. Bobby blew out a breath and headed for the captain’s seat, as Hen and Chim exchanged weary looks.

“Which one do you want?” Hen asked, as they trudged back to the ambulance.

“Neither.”

“Not an option.”

Chim sighed.

“OK, bagsy Buckaroo, but I’m playing a substitute.”

“Maddie?”

“You bet. You gonna be OK with Eddie?”

Hen pulled a face at him as they belted up and started the engine.

“I think I’ll need another coffee before I deal with that level of repressed...but yeah, I got it.”

The drive back to the fire house was slow through evening traffic. About halfway, Hen felt her phone buzz against her leg, but as it was in her trouser pocket and she was driving she ignored it until they pulled up inside the station. Extracting her phone, she saw Athena’s name on the screen and frowned, then swiped through to her message. She had to read it a few times, and the attachment that came with it, before the penny dropped.

“Oh hell.”

“What?” Chim asked, leaning over her shoulder.

“I just got a text from Athena. Buck and Eddie have gone viral.”

*****

“‘ _Just saw two firefighters making out on kiss cam at the Clippers game. Almost too hot for TV!_ _’_ _”_

Athena read the social media comments aloud to Bobby as they got ready for bed that night.

“‘ _If I join the LAFD, do I get to make out with their hottest firefighters too?’_ ”

“Hey, Chim was Mr April 2019, he won’t be happy being left out of that,” Bobby joked.

“‘ _I wish my boyfriend kissed me like that.’_ ”

“It was quite a kiss,” Bobby conceded, unbuttoning his shirt.

“‘ _With chemistry like this, these guys are going to be starting more fires than they’re putting out.’_ ”

“Should I be offended that no one comments on our chemistry like this?”

“Chemistry dies when you get married, didn’t you know that?” Athena said dryly, without looking up.

“Oh I don’t know about that, I think we’ve still got it,” Bobby said, leaning in to kiss his wife’s neck.

“‘ _This is the definition of chaotic husband energy.’_ ”

“What, us?”

Athena shot him a look, lips quirking against her will into a smile.

“Focus, Bobby. I’m talking about Buck and Eddie.”

“They’re married now?”

“They’re co-parenting a nine year-old, it’s not exactly a left field guess.” Athena’s eyes widened. “They’ve even got their own hashtag!”

“You’re kidding,” Bobby said, sitting down on the bed beside her so he could see her iPad.

“I’m not,” Athena retorted, pointing to the screen. “#BurningLove. It’s on a lot of these posts. And I’ve seen that video – they’re not wrong. Half the city’s going to think they left that stadium and spontaneously combusted in the back of the fire truck.”

“Buck’s banned from doing that sort of thing in fire trucks anymore,” Bobby said, leaning over her shoulder to read more of the comments. “People are certainly invested in their fictional relationship. You should have heard the reaction they got in the stadium as we left.”

“Oh, I heard enough in the video. So, how did they take it?”

“Well after shouting at each other in the parking lot, they didn’t speak for the rest of shift. Hen and Chim told us about the video – and read out some of the comments – at which point Eddie hid out in the gym and Buck took off somewhere else. I think he goes to the roof when he wants to be alone, but I thought he needed some time to himself so I didn’t test my hunch this time.”

Athena sighed.

“I mean, I can’t say I didn’t see this coming. You’d need one of your axes to cut through all that sexual tension. But I didn’t think they’d be quite so public when they finally acted on it.”

“It was an impulse move on Buck’s part.”

“Eddie didn’t exactly resist, though, did he?” Athena pointed out, gesturing at the screen to make her point. “He wanted that just as much as Buck did, he just got cold feet when he realised it outed them to a stadium full of strangers.”

Bobby opened his mouth to reply, but was interrupted by his phone ringing. With a confused look at Athena, he headed out of the room to answer it. When he returned a few minutes later, she shot him a raised eyebrow.

“Commander Bowman wants to see me in the morning.”

*

“Can you get that, Chim? It’s Buck!” Maddie called from the bathroom the next morning. Chimney padded through the apartment and threw the door open.

“Hey, it’s one half of #BurningLove! At my front door! Angelinos everywhere are going to be so jealous.”

“Hey, Chim.”

“Ooh, that wasn’t a happy hello. Still not speaking to Eddie then?”

“What do you think?”

“I think I shouldn’t have answered the door, and then we could have avoided this fun conversation.”

Chim stepped back to let Buck into the apartment.

“Maddie’s just getting ready. Do you want a coffee?”

“I’m two down already, I probably shouldn’t.”

Giving up on humour to power the conversation, Chim opted instead for silence, and watched Buck surreptitiously as he poured himself a coffee in the kitchen. He was quieter than normal, his normally carefree expression serious and distracted. He didn’t even attempt to make small talk, retrieving his phone from his jacket once or twice to check the screen, before pocketing it again with a sigh. Chim knew without asking who he was hoping to hear from. It was only when Maddie emerged into the kitchen, bump showing under her dress, that Buck came to life for the first time that day.

“Hey! How is my niece or nephew this morning?”

He bounded forward to talk to his sister’s bump.

“Well he or she didn’t make me throw up this morning, so that is definite bonus,” Maddie said, slipping her handbag onto her shoulder and draping a jacket over her arm. “You ready? Breakfast on me?”

Buck nodded, straightened up and headed for the door.

“Sure. See you at work, Chim.”

Chimney hesitated, then blurted out the words that had been turning around in his head since yesterday afternoon.

“For what it’s worth, Buckaroo, I thought it was romantic as hell.”

Buck stopped halfway out the door, surprised. But the smile on his face was genuine.

“Thanks, Chim,” he said quietly.

*

Over coffee and pancakes, Maddie studied her brother.

“So, how are you doing?”

Buck grimaced.

“Great. Just great. The whole city thinks we’re dating, I keep getting texts from people congratulating me about being out and proud, and Eddie won’t even speak to me.”

Buck fished in his pocket for his phone. “Do you remember Ali?”

“Your ex-girlfriend?”

Buck nodded, and tapped through his phone to his messages.

“She texted me this morning saying _‘Hey, long time no speak! Saw you and Eddie on the morning news. I always thought there was something_ _between you two_ _! You make a_ _way_ _cuter couple than_ _we_ _ever did. Hope you’re both well.’_ ” Buck looked up, eyes wide. “What does she mean, she always thought there was something going on with me and Eddie?”

“Well she’s not blind, Buck,” Maddie said dryly. “The rest of us have been waiting for you two to catch up for nearly two years now.” Buck gawped at her and Maddie’s expression softened. “Do you know any other friends who are as close as you two without there being something more to it? Because I don’t.”

“We’ve always been like that,” Buck said automatically. “It’s just how we are.”

Maddie sipped her coffee, considering her next line of attack.

“Remember when you tried to tell me and Chim that we were dating way before we even realised it? How did you put it? We were always hanging out, we had a standing dinner arrangement every Friday, we finished each other’s sentences. Sound familiar?”

“Yeah...oh.”

“Mmhmm,” Maddie nodded sagely as her point hit home. She gave Buck a second to process, then powered on. “So, Eddie’s not spoken to you since you argued?”  
Buck shook his head, expression souring, as he twisted a packet of sugar between his fingers.

“I don’t get why he’s so mad at me, Mads. It was just a kiss.”

Maddie smiled sympathetically, cradling her mug of coffee.

“To you, it’s just a kiss. To Eddie, it’s a statement, of who he is and the choices he’s made about his life. You’ve always been more relaxed about who you love, Evan. But Eddie’s not like you. He’s going to need time.”

Buck looked up in alarm.

“I never said _love_ , Maddie...”

“You didn’t have to, Evan. I’m your big sister, I know you.”

*

“Thank you for coming in at such short notice, Captain Nash.”

“Not at all, Commander.”

“I assume you know why I’ve asked you to come in?”

“I have a hunch.”

Commander Bowman gestured for him to sit, and walked around the back of his desk so he could see his computer screen. Bobby was glad Athena had given him the rundown on every article she could find before he left. At least he was prepared for what he was about to hear.

“‘ _LAFD Firefighters filmed in passionate embrace on LA Clippers Kiss Cam_.’”

Bowman looked over at him, eyebrows raised. “This happened on your watch?”

Bobby sat up in his chair. “Yes, last night. We attended a call to the Staples Center to two patients trapped by seating in the stadium. They ran the Kiss Cam while we were there to keep the crowd entertained while the game was paused. It landed on Firefighter Buckley and Firefighter Diaz just as we were about to leave.”

Bowman nodded shortly and dropped his gaze back to the computer monitor, reading from the screen.

“‘ _Sources suggest one of the firefighters is Evan Buckley, who suffered a devastating injury that nearly ended his career two years ago when the fire truck he was travelling in was blown up. The other firefighter is believed to be Edmundo Diaz, former Staff Sergeant in the US Army, and recipient of a Silver Star for_ _gallantry and intrepidity_ _in Afghanistan.’_ ”

Bobby’s jaw dropped, despite himself. He was ready for lewd comments, but not for how much the media had managed to dig up on his crew in less than 24 hours.

“How did they know that?” he asked faintly, shaking his head.

“The press finds a way,” the Commander said darkly. “What _I_ want to know is why I wasn’t told about Buckley and Diaz?”

“Umm, well they’re not actually a couple...”

Bowman stared at him like Bobby was yanking his chain.

“You saw that kiss, Captain Nash?”

Bobby nodded slowly.

“I have, Commander. I was there.”

“Then how _the hell_ can you sit there and tell me they’re not together?”

Bobby shrugged.

“I don’t know what to tell you, Commander. To my knowledge they’re just friends.”

Bowman scoffed.

“ _Just friends_ my ass. What’s holding them back?”

Bobby fought a smile at his directness.

“Cluelessnes, obliviousness, and a sizeable helping of fear.”

Bowman shook his head, staring at the screen, where Bobby presumed he could see an image of Buck and Eddie.

“Damn shame to deny yourself happiness out of fear.” He looked back at Bobby. “Now, while I can’t condone that kind of conduct on duty – and it’s not exactly Buckley’s first offence – I can’t deny that our approval ratings are through the roof as a result, especially with LGBT+ groups. The press are all over it, of course. Taylor Kelly has requested an interview with them –”

“No,” Bobby interrupted instinctively, and Bowman’s eyebrows rose. Bobby hurried to correct his slip. “I mean, Buck and Eddie are very private people. Even if they were in a relationship, an interview is the last thing they’d want to do.” _Especially with Taylor Kelly_ , he added internally.

“Buckley, private?”

“Fair point. But Firefighter Diaz definitely doesn’t want to be in the public eye.”

“Well he may not have a choice. Whether I grant her request for an interview or not, I’m fairly sure Taylor Kelly will be running a story regardless.”

Commander Bowman sank slowly into his chair, regarding Bobby with something like sympathy.

“Look, it’s the 21st century. People have a right to be in a relationship with whoever they want, without comment. But this is Los Angeles, and we are the LAFD. We don’t get that same right to privacy as other people, especially when a relationship plays out in such a public space. There will be comments and there will be opinions, and they need to be ready for it.”

He leaned forward, forearms resting on the desk.

“If Buckley and Diaz are in a relationship, or they want to be, I don’t have a problem with that. But I need to know, and so do you, Captain Nash. It cannot affect their professional conduct. If we reach a stage where they can’t save lives because they’re too distracted by each other, one of them will have to move houses.”

“I’m aware of that, Commander.”

“Then I suggest you get to the bottom of this kiss before the day is out. Get your house in order, Captain Nash.”

*

Hen tracked Eddie down in the locker room an hour before their shift, staring into space. He jumped when he heard her footsteps, but relaxed when he saw who it was.

“So, how are you doing?”

Eddie grimaced.

“Both my sisters have called me demanding to know why I didn’t tell them about my boyfriend. My abuela wants me to invite Buck round for Thanksgiving, and my parents are threatening not to speak to me again if it’s true.”

Hen gave a low whistle as she sat down beside him.

“That’s about the whole spectrum of reactions in one then.”

Eddie nodded.

“Look, Hen, I know I kissed Buck back. But I got caught up in the moment.” He paused, his expression panicked. “I...I can’t lie and say I haven’t thought about doing that for a while now. But I’m not sure I’m ready to face what it means. And I’m really not ready for the whole of LA to know and have an opinion on it.”

“Unfortunately, I’m pretty sure that ship sailed yesterday afternoon when that video made its way onto social media. But you don’t owe anyone an explanation, Eddie. Let them think what they want.”

“Easy for you to say. You’re not afraid of who you are.”

Hen smiled without humour.

“Just because I’m not ashamed it doesn’t mean I’m never afraid. It’s scary to walk through the world when you know there are plenty of people out there who don’t accept the truth of who you are. It’s scary to know that your authentic self isn’t valid to them, and that every election that comes around brings a chance that they might tear down the basic rights we’ve fought and died for.”

Eddie looked down at the ground.

“Everyone thinks I’m some sort of hero, because I went to war. But war was easy. My marriage was hard. Raising Christopher, especially as a single dad, is hard. Living without bowing to other people’s expectations is hard...and I don’t know if I’m brave enough to be like you, Hen.”

“Look, you don’t have to call it gay, or bi. You can just call it ‘love without labels.'”

“I never said –”

“Come on, Eddie. I’ve seen the way you look at each other. You might be good at lying to yourself, but you can’t fool the rest of us. And when you kiss someone back like that, you’re definitely way beyond the friend zone.”

Hen put a gentle hand on Eddie’s arm.

“You know, it doesn’t matter what your parents think, or the guy across the street, or even the rest of us. What matters is how you feel. Your feelings are valid. You have to check in with yourself and your heart, and say screw it to the rest of them. You can’t live your life for other people’s approval.”

Hen stood to leave, to give Eddie some time to think. At the door she stopped.

“You know the real reason why Buck kissed you last night when that camera landed on you?”

Eddie met her gaze and slowly shook his head. “Because it sure as hell wasn’t attention-seeking or playing along because it’s what the crowd wanted. He did it because he thought it might be the only chance he ever got to kiss you. That boy has been gone on you since the first moment he saw you, Eddie. And he would move heaven and earth to see you happy.”

*

Bobby found the crew scattered around the loft. Hen and Chim had taken separate babysitting details, with Chim and Buck around the pool table while Hen and Eddie washed up the plates from lunch in the kitchen.

“Buckley, Diaz,” Bobby called. “A word.”

Buck and Eddie automatically looked at each other before quickly looking away again. As they walked slowly to Bobby, Hen joined Chim at the pool table, their expressions determinedly casual. But Bobby wasn’t fooled. He knew they would both be straining every muscle to catch what he had to say.

“Downstairs might be better,” Bobby said, changing his plans and leading them to his office. Buck and Eddie followed in silence, careful to keep distance between each other. The tension hung heavy like smoke over them.

“Everything OK, Cap?” Buck asked, as Eddie closed the office door behind them and Bobby sat down at his desk.

“You tell me.”

“We’re fine,” Buck said, darting a glance at Eddie, whose jaw was locked tight. “Nothing to see here.”

“That’s not what it looked like yesterday afternoon at the basketball game.”

“It was a dumb move,” Buck said. “I was playing along to the crowd. It wasn’t Eddie’s fault. If you’re going to punish anyone, it should be me.”

This drew Eddie’s gaze, but Buck avoided his eyes and stared straight ahead at Bobby, his back straight. For a moment, Eddie saw the Navy SEAL Buck had trained to be. Disciplined and loyal. And all so Eddie wouldn’t get into trouble. Eddie bit his lip and looked down at the floor, guilt prickling at his skin.

“No one’s in trouble,” Bobby reassured him. “I was called in to speak to Commander Bowman this morning. Apparently there has been some media interest about what happened at the game, and he wanted to know the truth behind the video. I told him that to my knowledge you were just friends. Was I wrong to tell him that?”

“No, Cap,” Buck said, his expression still determinedly blank. Eddie pursed his lips and said nothing. Bobby sighed.

“Look, I wish this didn’t have to be an issue. I don’t want to pry into my crew’s personal lives, but we’re not like everybody else. If two firefighters in a relationship work at the same house, we have to know about it, and be confident that it won’t affect how they do their jobs.”

He was met with silence. Buck stood rigidly, hands behind his back, staring straight ahead at the wall. Eddie’s features twisted with guilt as he looked over at Buck, but again he said nothing.

“OK,” Bobby said wearily. “You don’t have to answer me right away. If you need some time to work through this, together, then take it. But I need to know by the end of the week where you two stand. Whether it’s just friends or something more, that’s up to you.”

The bell rang, saving everyone in the room from a conversation none of them wanted to be part of. Bobby checked the call details.

“Structure fire in West Hills, let’s go.”

*

“So, are we gonna talk about this?” Buck asked casually, as he and Eddie unravelled a hose. The occupants were all out unharmed and being checked over by Hen and Chim, but the structure still blazed, and the other units hadn’t reached their side of the house yet.

“Really?” Eddie grunted, straightening the hose out to avoid kinks that would impede water flow. “We’re going to do this _now_?”

“Cap says we need to figure this out by the end of the week.” Buck angled the hose up towards the house and opened the line. He glanced back at Eddie. “And you can’t run away from me at a fire.”

“All anyone seems to want to do right now is talk,” Eddie grumbled. “You, Bobby, Hen, my parents, my sisters. What if I don’t have the words to talk about it?”

“Well let’s start simple. Do you regret it?”

“No.”

The answer was instantaneous, and Buck tilted his head to the side, his face full of surprise and hope. Eddie sighed.

“I don’t regret kissing you, Buck. That was never the problem. But being forced to share something so vulnerable and intimate, on camera, in front of a crowd of strangers? That’s what made me uncomfortable. Feeling that pressure from a bunch of people I don’t know. What gives them the right to share in something so personal, something that I don’t even understand?”

They took a few steps closer to the building, Buck angling the hose into the mouth of the flames. Eddie took a breath and continued while he could still summon the words, while they were still only with the fire as their only witness.

“And then it hit social media, and I went from trying to figure out these feelings on my own, to being in a full-blown relationship with you that half the city has an opinion about. My own family think they found out about this relationship through social media because I was too ashamed to tell them.”

“Are you ashamed?” Buck asked, keeping his gaze on the fire.

“You realise we’re not in a relationship for me to be ashamed of, right?”

“Not according to most of the city. Or my ex-girlfriend. Or my own sister. Apparently everyone we know has just been waiting for this day to come.”

Eddie stared at his best friend’s back, eyes tracing the letters spelling ‘BUCKLEY’ across the back of his turnout jacket, wondering if they’d all been right all along.

“I know I said it was only a kiss,” Buck called back to him, lifting his voice to be heard above the roar of the fire. “But I lied.”

He chanced a quick glance at Eddie. “It meant way more than that to me than that. And I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable, Eddie. That was never my intention. It’s just...I’ve been wanting to kiss you for years. And I told myself it would never happen, and I told myself I was OK with that. But when that camera stopped on us...I couldn’t help myself.”

Buck turned back to the fire and took a few steps closer to it. “I guess I thought I could get away with it because it was just like a dare. If I’d known it would blow up our entire friendship, believe me, I would never have done it.”

“You haven’t blown up our friendship. I just...it’s not so easy for me to just roll with my feelings like you do. It’s more complicated than that. I’m not that brave.”

Buck regarded him, his face lit with an orange glow from the flames.

“Eddie, you’re the bravest man I’ve ever met. You just need to trust yourself a little more.” He shut off the hose, the section of ground floor nearest to them now extinguished. “I’ve been with my fair share of women –”

“You’ve been with most people’s fair share of women, Buck.”

Buck pulled a face at him and ignored the interruption.

“–But I wouldn’t let the fact that I’ve been with a lot of _women_ , specifically, hold me back from finding happiness, however that comes to me. Whoever it is. You can’t help which way you fall, Eddie. And I’ve been falling for you a little bit more every day since we met.”

Buck held Eddie’s gaze, his ocean blue eyes steady and unafraid. Eddie felt a shy smile light up his face, as Buck’s words sent warmth glowing through his chest like white hot coals.

_BANG!_

In a rush, the roof above them gave way and a shower of debris rained down. As Buck looked up in alarm, a beam caught him a glancing blow, and he hit the ground as rubble pelted down after him.

“Buck!”

Eddie dropped the hose and charged across the grass, heart hammering against his ribs, shouting into his radio as he went.

“Cap, I need more units around the south-west side of the house, right now. We’ve got fallen debris, Buck’s trapped underneath.”

Eddie scrabbled at the rubble, not caring as it scraped against his bare skin and made it bleed.

“Buck. Buck! Can you hear me?”

Hen, Chim and Bobby rushed to his side, pulling debris out of the way. Luckily a lot of it was already burned, and splintered away easily under their hands and feet. It didn’t take them long to find their fallen firefighter. Pale from dust and ash, Buck lay sprawled beneath a beam. Blood trailed from a cut to his head. Eddie rocked back on his knees, fighting a sudden wave of nausea, and tried to think. The beam seemed to have avoided causing any major damage, but it pinned him close enough to the ground that he couldn’t move.

“We need to get this beam off,” he said.

“Not without checking to see if he’s got any spinal damage, and we can’t do that til he comes round,” Hen said firmly. Eddie nodded shortly. He knew she was right, but it didn’t stop him from feeling helpless.

“Come on Buck, open your eyes,” he muttered fiercely, reaching for Buck’s hand beneath the rubble.

“Eddie.”

It was a whisper, but it was there. Eddie leaned forward over his best friend, gazing at his face, willing him to open his eyes. Finally they fluttered open, a sliver of blue squinting up at the sky.

“What happened?”

“The building collapsed. There wasn’t time for you to move out of the way,” Eddie said.

“Buck, can you feel your fingers and toes?” Hen asked.

“Yeah, I think so. It’s a bit hard to breathe with all this stuff on top of me though. And I think I took a bit of a knock to the head. Feel dizzy and I’m only lying down.”

“Right, that’s good enough for me,” Bobby said. “Let’s get this debris off him _now_.”

Eddie and Chim scrambled to help, heaving on Bobby’s count, dragging the rubble pinning Buck to the ground away. Buck groaned and Hen leaned forward.

“Stay still, Buck.”

Eddie dropped back to his knees beside her. Buck’s eyes sought out his.

“See, I told you, Eddie,” he said, his voice still slightly faint. “You can’t help which way you fall.”

“That isn’t even a little bit funny.”

“I thought it was pretty funny.”

“You’re concussed.”

“I love you.”

Eddie jolted like he’d been shot through with an electric current. Hen, Chim and Bobby all stilled, darting glances between each other and Buck and Eddie. Eyes half-closed, Buck rambled on, oblivious.

“You ought to know, just in case I die.”

Eddie opened his mouth, willing words to come out, but his vocal chords stuck fast, his throat constricting with panic. Chim shot a glance at Eddie and came to his aid, breaking the tense silence.

“You’re definitely concussed then, Buckaroo, because you’re not going to die today,” he said loudly. “Looks like someone’s heading for another trip to hospital though. Have you got you your own room yet? Have they named a ward after you?”

He and Hen helped Buck into a sitting position, checking vitals and assessing injuries. Eddie stood, stumbling back out of their way.

_I love you._

The words reverberated like a drumbeat in his chest.

With some arguing, Buck clambered carefully to his feet, and Hen helped him walk to the ambulance, where she began cleaning the gash on his forehead and wrapping the minor cuts on a hand. With every minute that passed, Buck came back to himself more and more. And with every minute he worked harder to avoid Eddie’s gaze, dropping his head in embarrassment or disappointment. Eddie remained rooted to the spot, staring after Buck.

_I love you._

“Is that your boyfriend?”

One of the occupants from the house, a boy not much older than Christopher, stood close by wrapped in a foil blanket. He was watching Eddie closely, seeing how he hovered close to Buck, wracked with concern and guilt.

Buck heard the boy’s question and looked up. Eddie looked from him to the boy.

“Yeah, he is,” he said, finally finding his voice.

“Is he going to be OK?”

“I hope so, buddy.”

The boy’s mom called to him, and he hurried to join her. Hen slipped away, throwing a meaningful look at Eddie as she passed, and he walked the remaining steps to join his best friend on the steps at the back of the ambulance. Buck was watching him with a strange expression.

“What do you want, Eddie?” he asked, his voice halfway between hope and resignation.

_I love you._

And suddenly, Eddie realised, the answer couldn’t have been easier.

“You, Buck.” He sat beside him on the steps. “I was never mad at you or ashamed of you. I was afraid. Afraid of my feelings, afraid of having to make a statement about who I am and how I feel. I never signed up to be anybody’s poster boy.”

“You don’t have to be. What we do is nobody’s business but ours.” Buck paused, and shot him a half-smile that Eddie returned automatically. “And maybe Bobby’s, because he basically owns us.”

“Did I hear my name?”

Bobby appeared around the side of the ambulance.

“How are you doing, Buck?” he asked.

“I’ll live,” Buck said, lifting one bandaged hand to his head, wincing.

“Glad to hear it. I’ve never met anyone who made better use of our department’s medical insurance than you. If you’re refusing hospital treatment, which Hen tells me you are, have you at least got somewhere to stay tonight, so someone can keep an eye on you?”

“He does,” Eddie replied, and Buck looked at him in surprise. Putting one hand gently on Buck’s shoulder, Eddie rose to his feet, self-conscious but determined. “And, umm, Cap. That talk we had this morning. The answer is yes.”

Eddie took a deep breath, and summoned all his courage. “I’m crazy about Buck. So, if he wants it, then you can tell the Commander that yeah, we are together.”

Bobby tried to keep his captain’s composure, he really did. But his eyebrows gave away his surprise first.

“OK, I’ll let him know. There will be some forms to fill in, but they can wait. What matters now is that you’re both OK.”

Eddie looked to Buck. His best friend’s smile was so wide it nearly split his face in two as he answered Bobby, never taking his eyes from Eddie’s.

“Yeah, we’re good, Cap.”

Bobby’s face broke into a smile.

“Well I’m very happy for you both. I just hope you’re ready for the jokes that Hen and Chim have undoubtedly prepared for this moment.”

Bobby turned and wandered back to Hen and Chim, both gawping from a distance. Buck laughed and waved, and they both looked hurriedly away, all attempts at subtlety wasted.

“This isn’t exactly how I imagined this might happen,” Eddie remarked, leaning back beside him.

“I thought it was romantic as hell.”

  
“You would. You’ve always liked the dramatic.” Eddie shook his head ruefully. “I also didn’t imagine that our first kiss would be in front of 19,000 LA Clippers fans.”

“Oh, so you thought about what our first kiss would be then?” Buck asked playfully, nudging his shoulder, and Eddie flushed. Buck laughed. “It’s cool, I have too. And my version had far fewer basketball fans in it too.”

“Oh yeah? What did you imagine then?” Eddie asked, surprising himself with his boldness as he leaned sideways, locking eyes with Buck. A wicked smile curved Buck’s lips that made Eddie think he might regret asking, and he leaned in too, right into Eddie’s space.

“Well there might have been a shower and not many clothes involved,” he murmured, and Eddie’s heart rate spiked.

“Wow, jump right in there with the smut, Buckley,” he replied, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Well that was only one possibility,” Buck conceded. “But I have had two years to imagine it, so some versions are more R-rated than others...”

His eyes moved slowly down to Eddie’s lips and back up to his eyes. He smiled, and Eddie’s heart thumped against his ribs.

“You might have to tell me about them some time,” he said, his voice uneven. Buck leaned forward again, and his lips brushed Eddie’s ear, breath hot against his skin.

“I could. But I think we’d have a lot more fun if I showed you.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” Eddie whispered, and he closed the distance between them and captured Buck’s lips with his.

**Author's Note:**

> If you made it this far, I really hope you enjoyed it. As always, forgive any glaringly British things I might have written, and let me know any major errors so I can correct them! Comments and kudos make my day/week/year. Thank you for reading!


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